Tuesday, September 16, 2014

What is the Orthodox stance on beating your children?

On the one hand, the Bible commands us to do so (with a stick!). Further, it is legal in these United States. Therefore, it is a very popular option for American Christian Conservatives and therefore for many Orthodox Christians as well. I suspect most "spare the rod", but I think many would be surprised at how often implements gets used. One proponent of the "beating your children" camp is popular internet commentator Fr John Whiteford. He ably makes the scriptural case (and includes patristic references) for hitting your children, perhaps with sticks, when they misbehave. It is not only a permissible option in this view, but a mandatory one.

On the other hand, all the research indicates that beating your children has bad outcomes in the long run and in the short run doesn't do better than other effective methods of discipline. It further teaches children that hitting people is an appropriate way of getting things in order. For more on the research, see this article (note: it's a review article in a law journal by a scientist, not a science article, but it seems to be a fair summary of the research). In short, it doesn't work as well as other forms of discipline as discipline and it has bad side effects.

I'm not saying you are a bad parent if you beat your children (perhaps with a stick). I'm suggesting that you should reconsider your methods in light of the damage you are causing, despite what some appear to think the Church teaches about the proper way to discipline your child (ie with a stick).

2 comments:

Gregory said...

Presbyter John Whiteford notwithstanding, Christ Jesus never told his followers: "Follow the Bible." Instead, he told his followers: "Follow me." Christians are followers of Christ Jesus, not the Bible. To follow the Bible makes one a Biblicist, not a Christian.

What would Christ Jesus say about beating one's children? His words in Luke 6:31 give us a pretty big hint: "Treat others the same way you want to be treated." The conclusion is pretty obviously: Don't want to be beaten? Then don't go around beating anybody else.

There are many other ways to discipline children that are much more positive and healthy than beating. No Christian ought to advocate anything that violates the letter and the spirit of Christ Jesus' command in Luke 6:31.

Mr. G. Z. T. said...

Well put.